Why don’t people realize the choices they make are important? Every single one of them to the minutest detail helps to define who they are. I watch people create circles that they can’t escape from and see them wonder why…

 

I was asked to do this blog thing, with the suggestion that I write about the positive living I promote. I’ve found it incredibly difficult to find a place to start and I worry about how it goes or how to end it, because it’s all so interconnected and pervasive… Hopefully I’ll be able to not get lost in my ramblings and provide some food for thought and impetus for change. Loving energy goes to all who care enough to read!

 

I think the most important place to start on a new path is language. Every single word we speak and thought we allow are what sets the tone of our lives. Choose! Choose carefully and deliberately. Truly, I tell you exercising that choice is what empowers us to have the life we want and deserve. I urge you to take control of this one little aspect of your world and you will see a whole new life before you.

 

How does this work you ask? What difference does it make which words I use? Consider for a minute how music can affect your mood. It can lift you out of the doldrums; it can sedate, instigate and exaggerate what you’re already feeling. The words you use can have the same effect. If I tell you I’m not bad, does that mean the same thing as if my answer is good, when you ask me how I’m doing? Is “good” really that much better? I think most people would say yes, it sounds like you’re doing better than “not bad”… but in truth, when I’ve asked people about their response of “not bad” they tell me that they are indeed good, it’s just a different way of saying the same thing. So the speaker means the same thing, the listener hears a difference. Well, we listen to ourselves. Oh we listen to ourselves so much. In fact our “self talk” is probably the most prevalent force in our minds. How about your reaction when faced with a problem? Do you say “I can’t do this!” or do you say “This is going to be a challenge!”? Your approach determines the outcome.

 

I remember when I was a teenager and I had to go to some kind of function that I didn’t really want to attend. I whined, as most teenagers would, “it’s gonna be boring, no one will talk to me, there’s nothing to do…” and my mom told me then “whatever you think it’s going to be, that’s what it’ll be”. Like the self-fulfilling prophesy, if you expect a certain thing you will get that thing. If you are predicting an outcome you will see it because that’s what you’re looking for. Lately there’s a lot of talk going around about this. The well known book, The Secret, is really about utilizing that information to obtain goals. The Celestine Prophecies touched on the same thing years ago. Words are energy communicated. Tell the world what you want, not what you don’t want. Think of it this way, if you’re always on the lookout for what you don’t want in your life how will you see the things you do want? If you’re focused on finding a big red truck, will you see the colour of each car as it passes? Focus, perspective, and expectation are all realized through language. The glass half full people have a different perspective and expectation than those who see it half empty.

 

Ask anyone who sees me on a regular basis, they’ll tell you I’m always doing great, terrific or wonderful. Why? Because I choose to. I look at all that is right in my world and take time to appreciate those things. It’s not that I don’t have unhappiness or worries but I decide how important they are to me. I make a conscious choice to always bear in mind what really matters. My children are healthy and happy, I have my health, I have wonderful people in my life who lift me and support me and challenge me to be better. Those things matter. And as long as I have them, I’m doing great and my life is blessed. My financial distress, my emotional burdens are minor compared to that and my language reflects that feeling. I have a roof over my head and food in my belly, the rest of the financial considerations are merely wants, not needs… and pale in comparison to what matters.

 

My last boyfriend really struggled with this concept. He was one of those who sat back and said “why does shit always happen to me?” and if an opportunity was on the horizon he would say to himself and out loud “doesn’t matter cuz it’s never gonna happen” or “knowing my luck it’ll all fall through”… He never understood how he impacted the outcome. He used to say to me “it’s not that easy Kim”.. to which I responded, “I never said it was easy. It takes effort; diligent, conscious effort. But it is that simple.” Choose your words, choose your thoughts and choose your life. Now, I know why he struggled with this concept. It really wasn’t that he didn’t understand – but by acknowledging that you have this power to choose you also have to accept responsibility for your choices. Accepting that responsibility is so empowering!! It is what gives you the power to make a change, to live the life you want. Irresponsibility is one of my pet peeves and no doubt will find its way into one of my blogs but for now, we’ll leave that one be. ;)

 

So, I leave you with this challenge. Listen to yourself. Really hear the words you tell others and the ones you tell yourself in the confines of your head. Are you helping yourself or setting yourself up for failure? Make one small change… for the next couple of weeks, whenever someone asks you how you are, answer with a word better than good. It could be great, terrific, fantastic.. you choose, but say it with feeling. The best part of doing this is that not only will you feel better about you; you’ll also make other people smile and lift their spirits. Positive energy, like every other kind of energy, builds on itself. Like attracts like. You will have the odd person who seems like they hold it against you that you feel so good, just remember, they’re struggling so much they can’t bear the thought of someone else not struggling. Don’t let them bring you down. Once again, you get to choose. Choose not to let it bother you, but by all means accept and use the positive responses to lift yourself even higher and feel even better. It’ll get easier and it will grow around you! 

 

Love and light! Kim Kloud